Think Think

Every day require thinking..

I've been thinking a lot of thing.. studies and reflect back on everything..

Although stress strikes but God blessing never stop.

He gives me friends..a true friend to turn into..friends that care..

Friends who willing to help and I feel motivated by these people..

Even just asking a simple question of " How are you?"

I am thankful

Thank God..:)

The crazy moment

busy busy busy busy busy busy busy.....................................

Ever since entering Degree, life has change..

Never in my life I reach a limit of stressness..

There are certain things cant be expressed through the spoken words.

It is just hidden deep down in my heart..ache..

There are so many things bothering me..Studies..life..At times I feel like screaming my lung out..

God is really good..He knows me so well..He is the only one who truly care for me.. He never fails me..When I have no one to turn into..He is always and always there for me..

Last week was really crazy..I was so stress until I can cry at any moment..

during the weekend, things were splendid..I managed to have a lot of fun... I went out with Pastor's son and then get invited to join prayer meeting with the leaders..someone told me again and again I am being reminded..the busier u are the more you need to pray..

My heart felt peace and I stand on my feet again..

God really has His own way to deal with people.. I felt much better..much much better..

Thank you Lord for guiding me..

I really need to learn how to handle stress or else I don't know how things going to be..I may go crazy.. I somehow learn how to manage stress in study.. but there is another thing that isnt answered..

I wish to be treated better.. as a girlfriend..truly..

funtastic

Today is such a tiring day! yet at the same time a really fruitful day. I left home 7am and back at almost 9pm. I spent my day in Church, serving, praying and also having a great time of fellowshipping. In spite of my busy schedule, I thank God for letting me to learn and grow in knowledge.

One of the food stall in my condo is closing today. I am definitely going to miss the butter chicken. The best so far! I thank God that I get the chance to eat for the last time and it is buffet for only 10RM! really going to miss the food!

Eating dinner with friends really are fun, especially seeing them having fun grabbing as many food as they can- Butter chicken and kampung chilli beef. (^^)

However, I heard such an unhappy news from my friends about something.

There are times people get into trouble and it is common. At times we might think in such a way that other people might not think the same way. However! It is NEVER okay to assume and it is NEVER okay to create misunderstanding.

Firstly, it is obviously creating a misunderstanding via misperception. There is nothing wrong to have personal thinking but the way things were express sounded as if we dont even bother. Yes people may have problems BUT try to think logically it is normal for other people to get unhappy but that doesnt mean we dont care. If none of us care, we would not even bother to worry and the things happened werent happened to tempt anyone except the one who involved in it. There is nothing GOOD to see people's argue and it is not something to celebrate. I will only feel glad to see everything in a good term and not such a heathy incident. Do not take such assumption. it only create problem!

Secondly, the world does not goes around only within you. No body treats the way you feel. We never think of you that way why on EARTH you have to think of us in such manners. At times people are just busy and tired but that does not mean we do not bother and do not appreciate.

Seriously, at times we may feel in a very negative concept about things but we must always give a thought about it and make a confirmation.

If you can feel disappointed, what more of us? we can say nothing and will not say a thing. We are far away more disappointed to know such perception exist.

we all make mistakes.the Bible says that we aren't to have a hard-hearted,critical spirit toward each another,but instead to forgive one another n to show mercy to ane another just as God for Christ's sake has done for us - Eph 4:32

I am just going to put this thing aside and focus on my unfinished work. I just feel like have an early rest.

outing- Ice Kacang Puppy Love

Dearest Issac Lim invited everyone to go and watch the Ice Kacang Puppy Love movie, one of the main cast is Fish Leong (His most favourite Malaysian star). So we (8 people) went and we had a great time. Although I was rather unwilling to go due to never ending assignments..oh well!

I am glad that I went:)

The show was pretty good, it was fun

ny and there was a few touching s

cenes. Although the movie a little draggy and somewhat not a happy ending (the botak and the girl isnt together). Overall, I like it and they really did a good job.

It has been awhile since we went for an outing together. Although there was a little unhappy things happened. That's okay, things happened and I hope everything will okay =)

I am suposed to continue my work but

it is 12 midnight and I have to wake up

early tomorrow morning. I have to delay it again and have to finish it by monday!! Gosh..I really need a break! no assignments no nothing but enjoying myself like the way I did today.

*desperate mode*

*Dream team support Issac Lim_ Ice Kacang Puppy Love*

Ice Kacang Puppy Love supporters =P

Now is 2.05am and I am still awake.

I finally finish watching the whole 14 episodes of Taiwan drama entitled with Hi my sweetheart! acted by Show Lo and Rainie. The whole drama really reaally nice! romantic, and funny..although some people might find it a little childish because of the effect they use on some of the scenes..

However I love it! I watch it nonstop since yesterday and today. I barely did my assignments.

I will do it today..on sunday without any disturbance..I will try my best to finish 50% of it..

Show Lo is SO Cute! I am in Love with Show Lo after watching the drama!hahaha...ofcourse without the mushroom's head! but with the heart of Da Lung..perfect!

If there is anymore show on Show Lo, I will watch it..!hehe..

ahh...It is time to sleep...tomorrow have to be ready for war (assignments)

Time is ticking real quick each day. Sigh. I barely used my time well.

Morning and night passed by so fast. I still have alot of assignments to do and yet I have no Idea how to do it.

The Alice I know, Isn't weak like this and never given up so easily. However, ever since I've entered University level. Somehow I lost my confident, things are just so different. The assignments seems so tough and I am so afraid that I wont make it. Everyone also seems feeling the same way as I do. I can survive until now because I keep pushing myself and when there's a chance or Idea I'll take it. I can no longer being like this, always take chances. I need to do better.

If only, each time I need an inspiration. Snap! there I have one and snap! I have another brilliant idea. Although my life is like a roller coaster lately, I still somehow manage to have fun.

Last night was fun. I had dinner with 15 people. It was a CellGroup outing. Everyone had fun. we joke and laughed. The food were delicious. On other hand I really hope our Cellgroup can have a revival breakthrough. We have many members yet not many are strongly planted.

Deep down in my heart, I really pray strong and asked God to really mold everyone and if really His will is wanting for them to grow in our CG then they shall be.

In overall, I just hoping that my days ahead will be exciting and amazing. I hope I can finish my assignments before end of this month. Before I am going off for a vacation to celebrate my darling's birthday. *Pray hard*

Blogging again~

Few months had passed since the last time I blog. It was 2009 and now April 2010.

Time passes very quickly, I was enjoying my long holiday and now I am extremely busy with assignments. Endless assignments are making me really tired and I even reached the limit few weeks ago.

I am no longer in Diploma stage but I am already at University level, where there are no exams but 100% assignments based. I am going to have my semester break in 2 weeks yet assignments are still lining up. I cannot wait to have short break, just keep me away from assignments. that what I really wish at this moment but the reality is different. I still have to finish them even during the holidays.

Besides that I really wanna thank God for guiding me through and I am really happy that I am starting to serve once again as a teacher in Children Church. My first serving was during the Easter day, the kids are really wonderful. I am believing in God that He will expand my capacity and He will use me in a greater way.

At this moment I am sitting alone in the living room, with only my precious laptop and listen to the heavy rain and thunder plus blogging. I am thinking back on many months ago, appreciating with what I have. My heart is pondering upon something, funny but I dont know what am I pondering about. There is a hidden heavy feeling stuck within me. What ever it is, I just hope I'll find the answer sooner or later.

19th December 2009,

I didnt manage to update my blog on the 19 was because I went to my aunty house and before that I went to a mall and the mall is so pretty. Full of Christmas decoration, the best decoration compare to the others. Even they have fake snow. super nice, took some pictures with my cousin. Seriously, I wished that you were there with me instead of Melvin. I miss you so much..
Then we had our early dinner at Japanese restaurant. I love japanese food^^

that very moment, my baby was pissed due to his cousin's bf.He had to leave the service right after the praise and worship. be patient alright dear, If you are not happy just talk to him straight. Dont keep it to yourself, not good^^

then went for window shopping and then head to my cousin's house. However there was a change in plan. she brought us to a place to chill and eat. then only we continue to go my cousin's house. My baby called to check whether I've reached or not and the call was just in time when I just reached! so ngam..:)

When my baby went to bed, I accompanied my elder cousin to play Tom Rider until 2am. Then straight went to bed. Baby, I miss you and I wish you can meet my aunty and cousins. They really are nice people.

20th December 2009,

I woke up early at 7.30am and sat at the sofa, chit chat with my aunty. Then she showed me my cousin's pictures. It was hard for me to ask about what happened so I didnt ask but she suddenly talk about it and I could see her teary eyes until she really cried. I tried my best not to cry and be strong. But I couldnt, I drop few tears and tried my best to hold it. I rubbed away the remaining tears and tried to calm her down. Mother loves, I can see she misses him so much.
He brought so much joy in the family, he is funny, love to tease my aunty and joke around with everyone.

Then we head down to my cousin's grave and I did a little prayer for him. My uncle and aunty talked to him "ateen, Alice is here to visit you" I felt like crying again but I hold it.
After for awhile, we left and had our lunch. Then Melvin and I head to my mom's shop. around that time, my baby was about to go back Penang. I prayed for his safety in my heart. I prayed that God will protect him and guide him through his journey back safely.

I went to JPCC, where Pst Sydney Mohede is. The church somehow like ours, CHC but nothing beat CHC. my own church, I miss going to CHC with you baby. I miss CHC also. I miss the present of God so strong fell in the presence.

Once the Svs done, when I was on the way back. I was so worried that my baby didnt sms me. he was supposed to reach by then. Baby I am so scared to loose you. I love you so much dear.

I hope you have a great time in Penang with your family. I miss you so much..

On the 18th Dec 2009

My mom, Melvin, my mom friend and I went to the beach in Jakarta. I dislike the beach, as it is extremely dirty. I hate Indonesian people for being such an Ignorant asses. Only know how to use but do not even bother to take care the environment. However, we still went. I hate such a bad stomachache then went public toilet. The pain still there until I could not even eat lunch. my mom forced me to eat a little and I did.

We went to take a boat- small tour and took some pictures. Then we walk along the bridge and gosh! I miss my baby extremely bad, really missing him alot. I tried my best to enjoy and took some shot and my mom took some shot of me when I was "daydreaming" thinking of you

At night, we had some arguement and honestly I cried. I feel so bad and worst is I could not do anything, cant even touch him and I tried my best to cheer him up yet still cant. Baby, my heart weaken when I see you were down like yesterday.my whole heart and mind is thinking of you. I think about you more than I think about myself. I know this is sound stupid and impossible but please lets not fight or argue anymore. I cannot take it. I love you baby..

Anyway, here are some of the pictures.

Melvin and the Ladies.

My mom and I

Me standing on a boat

My mom and her friend posing

Thinking about my baby

So that are some of the pictures. ^^ mwakz!

On the 17th December 2009, early in the morning I chat and webcam with my dear. I am so happy and even missing him more and more. I had a great time chatting with him and his cousin.
Then we did our own activities for the day, Melvin and I went to my mom's shop for lunch and we decided to go to another mall in Jakarta. There are so many of them and so far we almost went to all of them. Then we met my cousin and her boyfriend and we went to watch avatar. It was so nice!!!!oh baby, How I wish that I could watch it with you. I was pretty jealous towards my cousin. She hugged her boyfriend while watching the movie and I couldnt. I am too far away from my baby but I know it is only for a short term. Soon I will reunite again with him.:)

anyway, I saw so many spongebob and Patrick mini statue in a mall. I will post the picture when I got the time to transfer them. when I saw Spongebob and Patrick, really reminds me of you dear. my baby love them so much. :)

I was actually just kidding when I asked him to buy me a perfume for Christmas present but he meant it. Baby, I will not lie. I am happy to get a Christmas present from you and I know it is a big step for you. You never bought anyone a present and I am surprised for that. Remember baby, what count is the heart and not the present. The sincerity of the heart.:)

I told you before, It is good to buy your beloved one a gift- even there are no celebration or events. As long as you have the will to give, I am as your girlfriend really am happy. Like I am willing to spend my money to give you surprised for your birthday. I know it may seems nothing but I thought you were looking for that particular thing and Hoping that you will be happy. Even for this Christmas, I am still looking for one present for you. I hope I will find the right one and you will love it.

I love you so much baby. How I wish that I can celebrate Christmas with you. From the deepest of me, I miss you so bad dear.

Today is 16th of December 2009. It is a week and four days I am In Jakarta and I miss my dear more and more. Each day I long to see your face, hear your voice and miss your touch.

Last night we didnt get to see each other from webcam. I was extremely happy, two days ago we webcam and we had a good laugh. oh baby, I truly miss you.

Today, the whole day didnt really do anything. Spent time watch dvds and in the evening. We went to a mall called City Walk. We ate SushiGroove and took some pictures purposely just to show my baby.

Baby, I am so happy to have you as my baby. Anyway, These are my pictures for today, Just to update you on my current condition. I had alot of fun in Jakarta (so far and thank God)

My mom and Mr Snowy~

Me infront of City Walk!!

Me Dancing with Mr Snowy~;p

Dont Think Twice!!Choose Me!=P

Me and Mr Snowyman!!:D

first day of the 2nd week in Jakarta

Happy 10th Months anniversary for being together with you baby!!I was waited for you to call or at least wish me through sms. I almost forgotten and thank God I remembered!

Today, I brought Melvin to go the nearest plaza. He managed to buy shirts and I accompanied him also try my very best to be a good host plus a good friend. Actually, I feel bad that I have no car to bring him around. So in return, I bring him around to shop and watch movie.

It was 4pm or so, I realized that it was our anniversary and I was pretty sad. The one next to me not my dear but Melvin. It is already the 10th months passed just like that. With no celebration and the worst, he was not at by my side.

10 months passed by so quickly and deep down in my heart wish that as time goes by; My relationship with my baby will get stronger and better. We can understand each other much better than before and keep the love strong between the both of us.
My mom said, it is only 10 months. what about years? will you able to keep up this kind of level later on? I just wish for the best and I do love you baby.

I love to hear you laugh, I love to see your smile, I love to look into your eyes that tells me- you love me. Nothing else I can ask from God, He has given me a chance to be someone who loves me and have found Jesus in his life. It is a blessing in my life to have him around.

Ilove you so much baby.

1 week in Jakarta

Today is Monday which make me feel like the first day in Jakarta and feels like on Sunday was the day I am still with you. I read my dear's blog and we thought about the same way. a week yet feels like forever.

Yesterday, I went to Ratu Plaza to fetch Melvin. His bus stopped at that mall which was pretty easy for my mom and I to get him. Once I met him, I am seriously thinking of my baby. I was like, damn! made me feel I am in Malaysia and I am just outside with Melvin and going home to where my baby at. However, I am not. After awhile, My mom finished her gym and met Melvin. I could see the akwardness and in the same time he was trying to be polite while my mom was trying to be a friendly host. After all it is nice to meet a friend.

Baby, I am so glad that I have friend to hang out with! even just for awhile. In this week, we are planning to meet our other college friends who stays in Jakarta. Hope things going to be really exciting!

Baby, I hate it so much to be far from you but in the same time I am glad for this chance. From this I can realise how much you mean to me and most importantly how much I mean to you. Even though my mom always said, It is good that your boyfriend is a good guy but you are still young and dont rush things, dont rush your feelings. I dont care about that, I know nothing last forever but I Love you baby and happy to have you as my baby.

When I heard your voice before I went to bed. Gosh, I miss you so bad. the more you miss me the more I miss you baby. I love you more baby!

I missed out 2 days to blog and also didnt manage to webcam and chat online with my baby. I am blogging right now, 7pm before I was about to leave for wedding dinner. My mom and I were invited to go as well. In case I have no time to blog later, so here I am blogging to share about 2 days ago.



In that two days, nothing much really happened. After I chat online and webcam with my dear, I went to my dad shop and help him the whole day. Then we went to my grandma house and reached around 7.30pm or 8pm. Then I went to buy food with my dad and we ate it together at home with my cousin also. Then I tried to do some bonding with my relatives, my grandma and my aunties. Then I went to bed early. From there I can only sms my dear and he called me once or twice. urgghh..I miss you!!



Then the next day, I woke up really early.6am!! then slack in my room until 7.30am and went to shower. then I got nothing to do and finally around noon 1pm, I could not take it anymore! I told my cousin that I am going with her to her campus. before went to her campus, we dropped by to my qiuKung (my grandma's brother). I was so shocked, when I saw him- He is really so skinny. I finally realised he is having cancer so went for kemoteraphy (forgotten how to spell the word). his side face got burned, I prayed in my heart that God will heal him!! I chit chat with him for awhile and then went off to my cousin campus.



Then waited for her to finish her exam. there was funny incident happened. The lecturer, suspect me and her bf helping one of the student (unidentified though). She took the book with her. lol!

We wen to the campus again on the next day and we Thank God they didnt take her name or else she can kiss goodbye to her result and must repeat the next semester!! I hangout for few hours there and proceed to my mom's shop. After that, I went home and thats when I read my dear's blog. How sweet you are baby, but remember words without action is zero. I love you dearly and I miss you more each day!

4th day in Jakarta

Today is the fourth day I am in Jakarta and I woke up around 9.15am. First thing I remembered was to online msn, I was afraid that he waited for me like yesterday. His msn was still on but there was no replied and I sent him message just to reconfirmed whether he was still asleep or already awoken.

He replied me and we video converence again. I love it. He even waited for me to finish shower.
Today my result is out and my baby helped to check. Thank you dear!
I am pretty happy that I reached my goal of having my cgpa above 3. Although I was pretty disappointed with one or two. well it is okay. Just like what my baby said. B is better than a C. grateful that there is no C.:)

I was at my mom shop until 1.15pm. i was supposed to reach my dad's shop by 1pm but suddenly heavy rain. I was a little wet from the drizzle. I helped my dad, checking some price code and send some items to my uncle shop right one floor below. Today so many people were talking to me and we were joking around. They are the worker in that area. Really nice and friendly.

Then didnt really talk much with my baby as he was about to work. around 5.30pm, my mom and I went to buy stuff to cook. corn soup! yummy!
then I spent my time watching dvd and finally I can talk with my darling in msn and most importantly can see his face!:D
He said I am becoming very sensitive once I reach Jakarta. no I am not, I am just observence thats all! or maybe a little..no idea.xD

hee:D
I love you dear.Sleep tight!

3rd day in Jakarta

Last night, I was hoping to be able to chat online with him but it didnt happen. I was really sad that I didnt hold my promise to my dear. He called me and was somehow a little bit happy. He was not mad but he understood my situation. I love it whenever I heard him talking in that way, full of understanding and my heart feels less burden. After we ended our conversation and I remembered that he told me he was going to sleep right after talking to me. So I decided to do the same and went to bed. I was over exhausted and woke up rather late. I jumped out of the bed and quickly online msn. There was he! man! I am so happy to see him talking to me right after I online.

Again we saw each other through webcam. Baby I miss you even more. I miss your presence. I miss your lame joke. I miss your hugs. I miss your cooking. I miss you!

The whole day, I spent my time watching animes and unpack unwanted clothes. Then he called me, I am always looking forward to his call and I miss his voice. Right now, while blogging, I am chating with him and this time he is rather quiet than yesterday. He told me that he is really tired but he still wants to wait for me to finish blogging.

I love you baby:)

2nd days in Jakarta

Today is the second day I am in Jakarta yet my mind is till thinking of my baby. Yesterday when I was still in KL. He told me that it is not as if we are going to break up and you are going back for holiday, so why have to cry? those words gave me strengh even just for awhile.

However, whenever I am in his arm and whenever he hug me, I felt so comfy and the feeling was just so nice. I couldnt stop myself to and let my tears out.



My heart soften whenever I heard him say I love you and throughout the day at home and in airport. Having him at by my side, I am more than happy and when he hugged me for the last moment before I left. I just wish time could stop. I cried and I cried all the way up the airplane.



We never part, even just a day for almost 10 months. we know each other ugly side and tend to get pissed at each other and also treated coldly. BUT, when I was about to leave. that was the moment, where I just want him to be by my side and wants to treasure every single moment.



at that moment, it made me realise that I want to have a better relationship with him and stay close to him. I dont care if he say that I am being manja but I prefer that than being cold to each other.



Today is a nightmare to me, I hate to live a life full of fear and pretend. I really want to fix my relationship with my dad. I would do anything but today made me think that it is useless.

He scolded me just because I miscalculated the amount of money. I dislike the way he talk. so sharp and hurt me so bad. Until made me think, IF only I got money. I wont even bother to ask and try to please him so much. I tried my very best to care and yet still useless.

Then my baby, he tried to cheer me up. Thank you dear and I miss you so bad.

Happy birthday to Issac Lim

Today is a special day for Mr Issac Lim aka ah pek :D

Happy Birthday to you.. I wish you happiness and long life.
We've known each other for almost two years and half.
The first time to get to know you, people say we were twins/ siblings and some people say we are like couple. =P

Just wanna let you know, I am glad and really am happy to have known you.
Together we've been through tough and happy time. We are together in dream team with the rest of our beloved friends.
Time passes so fast and we are finishing our college years.
I hope we will still contact each other and will not lost contact until we are turning old.=D


Once again Happy Birthday Issac Lim!!:D

*hugs*

Thank you

Today is a wonderful day!

First reason: No class!

Second reason: can wake up a later than 8!

Third reason: I went to college just for a briefing. I went by foot and It was really hot sunny day. I wish in my heart- God please let the cloud cover the sun and dont let me sweat. It really happened!! cloud blocked the sun until I reached college!! how wonderful!

Forth reason: Free lunch! the school provided! :P

Fifth reason: watched dvd while eating dinner with my loved one.

sixth reason: Took a nice bath~

Seventh reason: relaxing time while blogging.:D

Can we do that every single day? counting how many good things happen in a day.
At times, we faced one problem and we let that one take over many other things happened. We also assumed, everything is bad.

It is depending on each individual. we decide what we feel and we decide how things going to happen. Of course we do not control on what will happen next but we control our emotion, our thoughts and action.

We have to learn how to appreciate on the things we have and not complain on every single thing that went wrong.

(To those who read today's blog, please dont mind me. I am a little off today. )

I just wanna say Thank You God for giving me a peaceful day.:D

Wish

I enjoyed the things happened these days. Besides, having much freedom from assignments and project work. My relationship is sailing smoothly. Yesterday was my 8th Month anniversary. Nothing much happened and never expect anything much to happen as we never celebrated any anniversary even once. At first I was kinda feeling not right but after sometimes, get used to it. The only different was Justin and Joanne came over to have dinner together. I can see that he was so excited to have his friends come over to join us for dinner. everyone enjoyed the dinner.

My boyfriend treat me well and care about me, I remember he used to say he dislikes a girl who being overly "manja" and he said he doesnt mind me being that way. He even stop smoking, I kept asking him to stop and he is one stubborn guy. He never do what I asked him to do but he said to me and himself that he will stop smoking.

I really happy to see him change into a better guy. I am not saying those people who smoke are bad people but I just prefer a guy who doesnt smoke. It is unhealthy and waste too much money for something that will only kill you.
How I wish he will do something that will surprised me. I dont expect he will give me anything that is expensive. As long as it is something that really sweet from the bottom of his heart.;p

Every thing is going well but I dont know why my heart feel burden lately. feeling really worried. I realised that my diploma study is going to end soon and I am going home to my hometown for a month long. I wondered what goes in his mind after I told him about it.

I am so worried that I wont be able to come back to KL. I will continue my degree that is for sure but what if things change last minute. So many things running around my mind. I want this relationship will last long.

My boyfriend and I been through together alot and we've found out each other positive and ugly side. I admit he is rather different from other guys I've dated. I never paid for my own food and the stuff I bought But when I am with him, we pay for our own food and we even share when we wanna buy stuff. At first I find it really weird and kinda awkward but slowly I figure out and I dont mind to do all that because I understand his situation, he is only a student and his parents send him money enough for him to buy his needs. I hope once he is working, he will do what guys supposed to do.

I dont wish him to buy me diamond or pay for every of my expenses. If we really meant to be together, I just want a guy who is responsible, understanding, caring and gentle. I love it when I feel someone needs me and I loved it when someone loves me dearly. I really treasure my relationship. I love him for the way he is, the way he handle me- when he is sweet, he can be very sweet and I love it. I love it when I see him in church and pray together with me.I love the way he share stories whenever he experience new things in college or the places he went without me. I love the way he call me biebie. I love it when I saw him sleep talking and called biebie and I love the most when he cuddled me.

May God bless my relationship. God knows how told mold my character and I pray He will mold strong this relationship.^^

Biebie in case you read my blog and you may get angry when you read the way I say about you. Indeed I dislike that part of you but I love you and I learn to understand you more. I hope you will do the best for me. :)

Forgive my mistakes and sorry to piss you often. Love you lots^^

Happy 8th anniversary to my biebie and Myself! XP